Absolutes

An excerpt from There, Anne's Triathlon Training:

Insights I have had as a result of a one-year quest to resolve all personal issues before turning 50 so that the next how-ever-many could be error-free:

Despite my creativity, my intent, my will, my earnest, intense effort, I am hard to change.  As much as I might wish to be different, other, or more, after 50 years of a practiced pattern, the pattern probably will not be subject to much altering, despite my best efforts.  There’s a “this is it” finality to that which saddens me somewhat. 

My striving and seeking to find the one truth is a quest I must relinquish.  My striving and seeking to find, in any situation, which is black and which is white, which is good and which is evil, must be relinquished.  My yearning to always, always follow the high road is admirable and sweet, but ultimately naïve.  “Always” is much rarer than I thought.  What is right and what is wrong in any situation is so often unclear and the choices seem to array themselves on a continuum of sort of right or sort of wrong.  Judgment calls must be made and uncertainty must be tolerated.

I think I believed I would find peace in absolute certainty.  All I had to do was determine that absolute and I would be free of the unquiet of doubt.

Probably peace, although I still find myself resisting this, is found in accepting the ever-presence of uncertainty.

Comments

[Christina]

I found this version of you quite by accident - I, too, have been a seeker of what I have come to know as the "Great Mystery." I seek it still. But I no longer strive after it. As in the Matrix : "It is the question that drives you, Neo..."

It is the power of living right now - and now again...and again...until tomorrow and yesterday are vanished and there is only the clarity of this present moment - that is our certainty, I think. I'm glad I found this. :-)

[Anne Giles Clelland]

Thank you so much for your comment, Christina. The Anne Show is a place I expect to not come back to, but move ahead to. Thank you for reading. I'll see you ahead. :)